An Opposing View?

I see a lot of folks on here maintain they aren't shallow because they are dumping their spouse for getting fat.  I would like to see these same people make moral judgments on my situation.

I'm a thinling female who is also a life long FA.  

I married the fat ass of my dreams: 5'10 and 270 lbs - most of which sits in his Buddha belly, rubbing that round mass of hairy flab turns me on beyond belief.  When he's banging me from the top and I'm squished under his warm sweaty moobs, swallowing up and sticking to my tiny frame - ahhhh, it's the best feeling ever!

The doctor diagnosed my manly beast last year with high cholesterol and heart disease right around the corner.  He said he has to lose weight pronto - I was mortified!  I'm a feeder, you thinlings may not realize what this means:  no more of my buttery steaks and roasted ribs may I hand feed my gluttonous fatling.  :(   I can never again know the exquisite joy of watching my ham fisted man swallow down heaping hunks of my love meals.  I will never again be able to lay my head on his massive belly and listen to it extending and digesting!  For a feeder FA like me it's like being told you can't have an orgasm anymore!

My man has been eating tuna fish & lettuce like a good little patient, he has went down to 210 pounds......   The horror!  His head looks too big for his body now, his face is getting more wrinkled because there is little fat to fill his skin.  His hands have lost those meaty dimples which used to turn me on.... I'm stuck trying to get sexually attracted to a friggin' waif, it makes me feel like a lesbian to have a partner so skinny, TOTAL TURN OFF!

According to the logistics of this site, I'm supposed to leave my hubby because he doesn't do it for me anymore.....  And I'm not "shallow" for that, because everyone has a right to be sexually attracted to their mate, right???

But I doubt highly that's the advice you thinlings would be giving this FA. Instead, I'm sure I will hear how I'm supposed to just change my attractions to fit what the doctor says is healthy for my hubby.  As if I CAN change my attractions any more than you folks can....

The hypocrisy here has me rather miffed....

But I won't sweat it long, because I won't leave my SO.  He may not be able to be the fatling of my dreams anymore, but I promised to love him for life, no matter what came.  I intend on sticking to that promise.  If I have to I'll just flirt with the occasional BHM I meet to fill my kicks, perhaps try to invite over some friends I can push food on to get my secret kicks, I'll scan the net for some feeder porn, close my eyes when I give it to the hubby and try to remember what it was like when he was heavier, I'll learn to deal with it.  Because I am not about to destroy his heart of the hearts of my children just so I can get nailed my physical ideal.  The vow of my brain & heart meant more than the desires of my vagina....

posted by Charlotte 
on Matilda Tuesday's My Fat Spouse Forum

If you complain about a fat spouse... By A101

If you complain about a fat spouse STFU!....no! -

http://rioiriri.blogspot.com/2007/12/short-opinion-on-dan-savage-thing.html

A tiny thread from some blog most people havnt heard of. But anyway,it spouts the same old idea of if you dont find your overweight partner attractive then you'e bad, never loved them and yada ya.

When will these people realise the differacne between love and attraction and that to have a proper full relationship, many need to have EVERYTHING there.

These people say 'right on its personality not looks', but the thing is, if thats fine for them then great, however to me that type pf partner just sounds like a friend.

People still need a sex life and if looks aren't needed for YOu then fine, but to think that they are irrelevant or 'just packaging' for EVERYONE is stupid.

A person changes when they get older as they say, but they don't to the point of massive weight gains, naturally. That comes from not looking after yourself.

So in the style of words of this blogger 'If you have a fat spouse, shut the fuck up'. It doesn't matter if your partner doesn't look after themselves, therefore taking your sexlife, also causing frustration and resentment to build, because you are a normal human being and physical attraction is an important part of attraction as any other.

You should love them anyway............oh wait you DO, as everyone on here shows, they want their partner to be healthier aswell as look after the physcial side so everything is there for their relationship..........hmm who'd have thought that people would actually want a proper full relationship that they enjoy rather then only having certain bits that others have chosen for them?

Hating the FA movement and the message it is spreading amongst young women by Mary45

The bloggist "She Dances On The Sand" asks in a recent post why so many formerly fat women hate the FA so much. I'm one of those formerly fat women who is very upset by them, so I'll explain the reasons for my hatred.

Here is a copy-paste form the homepage of The World Health Organisation

Online Q&A
16 November 2006
What are the health consequences of being overweight?

Question and answer archives

Q: What are the health consequences of being overweight?

A: The latest WHO projections indicate that at least one in three of the world's adult population is overweight and almost one in 10 is obese. Additionally there are over 20 million children under age five who are overweight.

Being overweight or obese can have a serious impact on health. Carrying extra fat leads to serious health consequences such as cardiovascular disease (mainly heart disease and stroke), type 2 diabetes, musculoskeletal disorders like osteoarthritis, and some cancers (endometrial, breast and colon). These conditions cause premature death and substantial disability.

What is not widely known is that the risk of health problems starts when someone is only very slightly overweight, and that the likelihood of problems increases as someone becomes more and more overweight. Many of these conditions cause long-term suffering for individuals and families. In addition, the costs for the health care system can be extremely high.

The good news is that overweight and obesity are largely preventable. The key to success is to achieve an energy balance between calories consumed on one hand, and calories used on the other hand.

To reach this goal, people can limit energy intake from total fats and shift fat consumption away from saturated fats to unsaturated fats; increase consumption of fruit and vegetables, as well as legumes, whole grains and nuts; and limit their intake of sugars. And to increase calories used, people can boost their levels of physical activity - to at least 30 minutes of regular, moderate-intensity activity on most days.


I could leave it at that, but to clarify my very strong views I will relate my personal experiences. 15 years ago when I was at the age of 30 I came to a crossroads in my life. I had been thin through my university years, but had since married, settled down and started building my career in a demanding profession with long hours and little time for rest, exercise and caring for my health. My weight had crept up slowly but steadily about 3 kilos per year, and I had circa 15 kilos excess weight.

I wasn't feeling well and had difficulties sleeping, and at a health check was told by my doctor to lose weight and start an exercise regime. I was offended to have someone tell me I'm "too fat", but on the other hand I had to admit that it was the simple and honest truth. I decided to take my doctor's advice and found a form of exercise that suited my busy schedule and was said to be simple and effective. I started on a jogging-regime with the goal of running a 10k in one go. I also set out to find out about nutrition and how different foods affect your body and you weight. I managed to lose the weight and jogging became my favorite form of exercise and a hobby, something I still do almost every day because of the pleasure it gives me.

Today I'm 45 and my bmi is 21,5. My body is healthy and strong, and I can engage in almost any form of popular sport and physical activity that takes my fancy. I like to go sailing and kayaking, I'm a certified scuba-diver, I have been on a trek in Nepal, I can ski down mosts pists open to the public and I can challenge the guys at my golf-club. I don't need any form of medication whatsoever, and I have recovered from a hysterectomy in record time without any complications or difficulties.

I often wonder, what would my life be like today if I hadn't followed my doctor's advice? My weight would have continued to go up and today I could be morbidly obese. I can't say if I would be suffering from diabetes, cariovascular disease or cancer. Maybe I would, maybe I would not. But my lifestyle and quality of life would be very, very different. I see women of my age every day who are disabled and crippled by their weight. They suffer constant pain and their body has become a prison for life.

When I see young women who are on the brink of obesity I always wish I could walk up to them and tell them to do something now, before it is to late. It's not about how you look, it's about your health. You don't think about your weight as a health-issue when you are young, but when you are older good health is the most important factor when it comes to the quality of your life.

This is my reason for hating the FA and the message it is spreading amongst young women.