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Thursday, November 11, 2010

I read so many of the stories here and just had to sign up and tell mine.

Ive read so many of the stories here and just had to sign up and tell my story. Wife and I are in our late 30's...2 kids. 6 years old and 11 months old. Great kids, love em. I work and wife is a stay at home mom till she finds work. She is 5'4'' and normally weighs around 140 or so which looks good on her. When she was pregnant with last baby she but on 60 lbs. She used to run a lot but stopped after getting pregnant. After the baby, she was about 180. This was about 8 months ago. Since then she has only lost another 6 lbs. SIX ! About 6 months ago in counseling we discussed her weight and how much it bothered, she became hysterical---crying etc but I think with the help of the counselor its something we would work on together. We stopped counseling because it became too much for her to handle and she felt he was "siding" with me too much. For 5 months I said nothing to her. She occasionally worked out---but never adjusted her eating. She eats healthy food but late at night and seems to like her sweets as well. All her friends and immediate family are obese to morbidly obese. I thought I got the one thin person in the family but I guess not.

   



     In the last 3 weeks I have gotten back to talking about it after seeing she wasn't losing barely anything. I mentioned her health---how its a good example for our kids---I did workouts with her, changed my schedule so she could work out...bought her a treadmill..u name it I did it. We also had a lot of sex and I treated her exactly the same in bed.   3 weeks ago I went to her mothers house and saw her mother (who is older) in her non "dress up" clothes. It was a moo moo of sorts. She is easily 350 lbs or so...I felt so sad for her and thought what a difficult life she must have had due to all this excess weight. I also thought how difficult it must be for her husband who is a jack lalaine type. And I also thought about how my wife and all her overweight sisters just talk badly about the dad how he was always angry and so judgmental.  Not saying his wifes weight was everything but I sure think it contributed.  That day really hit home... I said that this is not going to be me in 50 years, no friggin way.  

Every single time I have brought this up...it is met with hysterical yelling, throwing things and threats of divorce. It is crazy. When I was discussing this with my wife this morning I honestly thought a vein was going to pop in her head. My wife has always struggled with her weight, and 10 to15 lbs overweight I can deal with. 40 I cant. Its gross, her belly sticks out more than her giant breasts, she has a ton of back fat and her legs and ass are look like ball park frank plump versions of what they used to be.  Facially she is beautiful, perhaps thats why she thinks its OK ? I dont know.
FYI---I lift weights and play basketball regularly so I am pretty fit and conscious of what and when I eat to keep myself looking good.

Reluctantly I am looking at different divorce options. I love my kids more than anything but I dont know what else to do with this obese woman who loves food more than her family it seems. 

             Posted by             FitHusband on Matilda Tuesday's My Fat Spouse Forum

3 comments:

  1. You're talking about divorcing a woman for a 40 lb weight gain??? 140 lbs I could see, but 40 lbs overweight is really not that much. At least try marriage counseling before you throw in the towel on your marriage. And read the book _The End of Overeating_ to better understand what those of us who are fixated on food go through.

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  2. Sorry, I meant to write "At least try marriage counseling with a different counselor before you throw in the towel." Maybe one for you, one for your wife. Also, she has lost 6 lbs in 6 months. Not great, but at least she lost something and hasn't kept on gaining. Give her a little credit.

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  3. Just received a check for $500.

    Many times people don't believe me when I tell them about how much money you can get filling out paid surveys from home...

    So I show them a video of myself getting paid $500 for taking paid surveys.

    ReplyDelete

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