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Saturday, January 9, 2010

"My Fat Spouse" changed my life

Demi posted this on the My Fat Spouse Forum

I'm sure your site was set up to provide an outlet for fit spouses to share frustration, but I wanted to tell you that in fact, it has changed my life as a fat wife.

I'm a smart woman -- I have a degree, an amazing career. I'm a good mom to three kids. And I have a solid, stable husband.

But until I read this site, I did not know. I feel so fucking stupid. Thank you for opening my eyes.

I did not know how he must feel about the 70 lbs I've gained in our 11 years of marriage. In these posts -- some ranting -- I have heard his voice. The words he's never had the courage or energy or chutzpah to say.

You're completely right. I have dishonored him, and embarrassed him by my weight gain. And that's not fair.

I've been reading here a week, and I've lost 7 lbs. I've been to the gym four times this week, and for an additional walk for 30 minutes each night. And I'm writing down every last thing that goes into my mouth. And I'm not sharing it with him yet, I'm just going to let him see results.

Thank you for your words, and your brutal honesty that rocked my world. I truly have always thought that my weight gain was all about me; I never really considered how it might be affecting him.

I can't lie, as I'm typing this, I'm cringing at how some of you are going to chop me up for this weight gain. You can call me fat, and even stupid for being so naive. But now I know better, and I'll do better.

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