I married when I was 24 years old, a man 10 years older than me. I am pisces and pisces tend to look for security in their relationsships.
He was fairly heavy when we met but I was young and thought it wouldn't matter and his other qualities would outweigh his belly.
We have two girls together, both grown up now.
After the second girl, my interest in sex with him (which was never really intense to begin with), faded to nothing. So we basically had a 20 year long sexless marriage which was hard on him too. I talked to him about his weight but he didn't change. He was frustrated because of the lack of sex and ate....
After our girls left home, I was thinking about how the rest of my life would look like if I stayed with him. Now don't get me wrong, he is a very, very good human being, generous, keeps his word, respectful ...but I couldn't see myself getting old with him. All the things I love like biking, hiking, kayaking...basically moving and doing things....were not his cup of tea, I guess mostly due to his weight, which he didn't get rid off.
I felt like my future was gloom and doom if I stayed. I wanted to be with an active partner and be able to do all the things I love to do.
I told him, that I couldn't live like that anymore and that I wanted out.
Then I had an affair with a guy, it was a wonderful summer....that's all I am going to say
My Ex and I divorced and I ended the affair. This guy wouldn't have worked out long time, we were too different but I sure realized how much fun (sex and otherwise) I could have.
I started the dating thing and found my Soulmate after a couple of months and we have been together for 3 years now. I am so happy now, sometimes I have a hard time believing it. We are extremly compatible, we are together 24/7 since we also work together since 2 years. Haven't had a fight in the 3 years we have been together.
We both are physically fit, love eating healthy food and I am feeling more like 30 than 53.
There is definetely live after divorce, even if you are older. 50 is the new 40 they say, but I believe it is more like the new 30.... at least that is how I feel.
Mountain posted this on the My Fat Spouse Forum, click here to read the whole thread