How I got my Fat Husband to Lose Weight

I'm an avid distance runner, personal trainer and I've helped couples get in shape together, guiding them through the many obstacles that can occur in physically mismatched relationships.

I was once asked for help by a couple where the woman was an accomplished half-marathon runner and her husband had neglected his body for close to two decades. He was 30 pounds above anything resembling normal weight and 50 pounds heavier than a runner of his age would be.

His wife was light, even for a runner. She was 5 ft 1 inch and 106 lbs. Her husband was 5 ft 10 inches and 225 lbs. She ran at least eight miles, six days a week. Once a year, she attended a one-week running camp in New Mexico along with other competitive runners of all ages. She had detailed control over her food and fluid intake, eating no junk food and drinking no soda. Alcohol was a complete no-no.

The husband, in contrast, loved barbecue, burgers, French fries, relish and dressing, beer, red wine, and liquor. He was also a smoker. The closest he came to physical activity was watching football on Sundays.

On the positive side, he was aware of how big he had become. He wanted to quit smoking and was ready to reduce his alcohol intake because it was making him tired in the evenings, giving him hangovers in the morning, and it was adversely affecting his sex life.

Cutting out the smoking and reducing the alcohol was relatively easy to do because he was motivated to do it. Improving his diet proved more difficult because he loved fast food and hated salad and vegetables. (He also confided in me that he wanted his wife to be 20 or 30 pounds heavier than her race weight, which wasn't going to happen.)

At first, I asked the couple to train together for 30 minutes a day for two weeks. The woman would use these sessions as a cool-down after her runs. The aim was to get the husband to walk at a brisk, but not uncomfortable, pace for 30 minutes, stopping if he needed to catch his breath (the stops were not part of the 30 minutes, which got him used to using a runner's watch).