I will start my story somewhat in the beginning. I met my husband when he was a chunky 220 at 5' 8" he had some pudge. I overlooked it thought it was something I could change.. cook healthy exercise and he would too. This didn't happen, now he has ballooned up to 300lbs. and I am grossed out by him. I do feel bad to say those words but I also feel that it is not fair. I get so angry at what he has done to our marriage by being so slovenly about his appearance. I feel awkward and embarrassed to introduce him to new people for fear of what they are going to think. It is embarrassing for people to think I actually have sex with such an obese person. I have brought it up to him that I want him to lose weight especially when he complains about the lack of sex. I even told him once that if I wanted tits in my face I would have sex with a woman, he said i was mean. I have tried being nice about it but I just can't be nice any more! I am angry frustrated hurt and lonely. I have no one to really talk to about this issue everyone calls me shallow. I have had 3 kids and work out watch what I eat to maintain a decent appearance. My husband is always telling me how hot I am and I just say lucky me for all the good it has done me! He doesn't get it. I am feeling like I could do so much better and am only in this marriage because of the kids. But I am too young to turn into a bitter unhappy woman. I do not like the person I am becoming and feel the only solution is divorce.
A calorie burned is a calorie earned!!
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Dear Not....
ReplyDeleteI want to tell you that you are not alone. My husband has also ballooned up to over 500lbs. He was 225 when we met. He can no longer do anything for himself. I help him get dressed in the morning. I help him in the bathroom because he can no longer wipe himself. I scratch his ass and balls because he can't. He sits on the couch and the kids and I get things for him because he says his back hurts too much.
I am sorry if this is too much information but this is what life is like with a fat spouse. The kids are very angry and hate their dad because we don't go on vacation or do anythign fun because he can't due to his weight. Since he is in constant pain he takes it out on the kids and I.
Please know that you are not alone in how you feel. I am no longer a wife but a caregiver. I beleive he is mad at me because he can sense my resentment. In your words....this is not what I signed up for.
I will be thinking of you and praying for your happiness.
Batgirl