No, I did not marry my wife exclusively based on her looks, but for starters her looks were definitely what got me first looking. If she had not looked the way she did then, but instead how she looks now(about 120+ extra lbs) I would not had even looked, let alone gotten to the dating, engagement, and eventually marriage part. Is that shallow? Maybe, but it is also human nature, a nature that has until now has ensured humanity’s survival as a species. Yes, I did ultimately marry her based on who I thought she was as a person. As a person she is great concerning many aspects of personality, but who I thought she was as a whole, is not who she turned out to be: concerning other aspects which I told her before our engagement were very important to me. And I, according to my wife am not who she thought I was-that is someone who said I was someone who valued health and appearance, but really didn't mean it or in her opinion wasn’t supposed to have meant it. In actuality I meant every word I told her before we got married, that is, that I could not stay married to someone who would be so disrespectful as to willfully make their self unattractive to their loved one by engaging in glutinous over-eating as I had witnessed other close family and extended family members do to the detriment and ultimate ruination of their marriage and happiness. Is my attitude selfish?Yes, of course it is. But it is an attitude that ensures best possible chance for the survival of my posterity. But is this type of selfishness regarding selection of a mate evil? I don’t believe so. If man was not endowed with such innate qualities and desires he would have gone the way of the DoDo bird long ago.
These thoughts were posted by Mojo on the
My Fat Spouse Forum
Would she have married you if you looked the way you do now?
ReplyDeleteWell, with the exception of perhaps a few more Clint Eastwood type crows feet and a little less hair, I haven't changed much at all since marriage. I fact, in some ways, I’m in better shape. So I asked her the other day about it. She agreed that I hadn't changed much at all, and she liked the fact I kept myself in good shape physically-only she said I was a much bigger a**hole. She also admitted to being jealous sometimes because she said it seemed so easy for me to stay fit, but so hard for her because she can't live without ice cream or pasta. She said she gets mad at me sometimes when she notices other attractive women noticing my body, and worries that they might try to "steal" me away. She even admitted that she wishes she could "fatten" me "up some" so she could worry less often.
ReplyDelete